Thursday, January 15, 2009

The Divine Cheeto

Can't Blame the Schools for This One

Five to ten times per year I will ask a student who is sleeping in class (generally after lunch) “what have you had to eat today?” The answer is usually “nothing” or “a bag of chips”. I remind them a car doesn’t run without gas. Forget are they concentrating? The real question is are they conscious?

Heaven forbid they leave home without their I-pod, cell phone, Personal Play Station, make-up, or other nano-device, but food, eh, I can buy some at school mom. If students don't have a backpack or paper it's almost a certain guarantee that they will at least have an I-pod in their pocket. It's the ubiquitous "Don't leave home without it" teen accessory.

Though I have never asked my 9th graders, I would assume that if given a choice of ways to die--- cancer, car accident, being shot, or other, most teens would choose OTHER and then list drowning to death in a tub of Cheetos as their preferred entrance into eternity.


It's actually funny how many 14 year old girls spend an hour (or more) on make-up and hair every morning and then have no clue how (un) attractive they look with orange fingers, lips and teeth after chomping on America's Favorite Bag of Food Coloring between classes. I tell them as a health teacher, me seeing them eat chips as they enter they might as well be smoking a cigarette. They think this is funny. Childhood obesity though, is not funny. When I am talking about it I make certain not to make eye contact with any particular student, but they're there, all over the place. In a typical class of 30 with half male, half female, I will have 5 to 6 boys weight over 175-200+ and 7 to 8 girls weighing 150 - 180 pounds. Did I mention these are 14 year olds?

Seems appropriate that this week a couple had their planned wedding in a Taco Bell. Reminds me of an 80's video title: The Decline of Western Civilization. "Nuff said.





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